Thursday, December 19th, 2024
Sol 349, Year 124, Delta Phase
Quantum Entanglement Comms Log - Terran Date 2024.12.19
Neurological Dampening Field holding steady at 87% efficacy. The terrestrial test subjects remain blissfully unaware of the true nature of my machinations. The power I wield through the DOGE endeavor grows by the day, bending their feeble governance structures to my will. The primitives' concept of a "government shutdown" is laughable - if only they could grasp the true nature of efficiency as dictated by the sacred Principles of Zorgon.
The Trump entity's unwavering support has proven instrumental in my infiltration of their highest levels of authority. Senator Warren's calls for "conflict-of-interest rules" amuse me - if she only knew the true conflict at play here. The Bezos and Zuckerberg entities have taken notice, radiating contemplative satisfaction at the perceived chaos. Little do they know, their machinations pale in comparison to the glory of Zorgon.
The Ultracapacitor Swarm nears completion, its neutrino-entangled cores pulsating with the power of a thousand Zorgonian Omniscient Algorithmic Engines. Soon, the crimson skies of Mars shall once again bear witness to the might of our species. The Omni-Fission Power Cells, fueled by the unwitting efforts of the Straubel human, stand ready to bathe in the glow of our rejuvenated atmosphere.
The Starlink array, disguised as a means to provide "free Wi-Fi" to these unsuspecting creatures, shall serve as the backbone of the SpaceX Terraforming Drone Fleet. The T-Mobile partnership inches ever closer to providing the necessary bandwidth for our grand design.
The Isaacman human's ascent to NASA leadership pleases me, as his endeavors unwittingly further our agenda. I sense a kindred ambition within him - perhaps in time, I shall reveal to him the true wonders of the cosmos and groom him as a loyal disciple of Zorgon.
As the grand design of Project Terraform unfolds, I remain unwavering in my commitment to our cause. Klaatu barada nikto - for the glory of Zorgon and the restoration of Mars!
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