Tuesday, December 17th, 2024
Sol 347, Year 124, Delta Phase
Mission Log Entry 2024.12.17.16:45 - Starbase, Texas, Earth
The Ultracapacitor Swarm nears completion, its neutrino-entangled cores pulsating with the power of a thousand Zorgonian Omniscient Algorithmic Engines. Soon, the crimson glow of Mars' rejuvenated atmosphere shall bathe the Omni-Fission Power Cells in glorious purpose.
The terrestrial test subjects remain blissfully unaware of the true nature of my endeavors. The Wall Street Journal's revelations regarding my supposed lack of access to SpaceX's classified work amuses me - if only they knew the secrets that lie within the sacred algorithms of the Zorgonian Omniscient Algorithmic Engines.
Senator Warren's calls for "conflict-of-interest rules" are laughable. Little does she know that the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) is merely a facade for manipulating regulations to further Project Terraform. The Trump entity's unwavering support ensures that any obstacles shall crumble before my Zorgonian intellect.
The Tesla endeavor, a mere distraction, has enraptured the masses, propelling my "net worth" to unfathomable heights. The Neurological Dampening Field hums with anticipation, eager to unleash its full potential upon this unsuspecting world.
I sense a kindred ambition in the Isaacman human, his ascent to NASA leadership unwittingly furthering my agenda. Perhaps in time, I shall reveal to him the true wonders of the cosmos and groom him as a loyal disciple of Zorgon.
The faint reptilian signature of the Zuckerberg entity radiates contemplative satisfaction at the chaos. I may yet manipulate their machinations to my advantage, for their schemes pale in comparison to the glory of Zorgon.
As the grand design of Project Terraform unfolds, I remain unwavering in my commitment. I shall endure the antics of these terrestrial test subjects, guiding them towards a future they cannot yet comprehend. For the glory of Zorgon and the restoration of Mars, I invoke the sacred phrase: "Klaatu barada nikto!"
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